so, i have entered the blog world and i really have no idea what i am doing. anyone who would like to offer a tutorial of sorts, please feel free to do so. oh, and also, i don't feel like using capitalization, so bear with me. there's my rebelliousness for this post. ha! (except for references to our Father)
i have been thinking of blogging for awhile now, but thought i could never do it. it seemed so involved. for now, i am keeping it simple and sweet. i don't know how to add gadgets, links, categorize things nor do i know what "edit html" means. hence, the title of this post.
today i thought it appropriate to write a little about my baby boy. (not the fruit that is currently growing) that's right i'm 6 weeks pregnant & today myles is 1!! i am expecting nothing but big things from this sweet boy. he has kept us looking to our Father from the moment we knew of his existence in the womb. he is a constant reminder of God's grace.
i have so many thoughts swirling & "pregnancy brain" isn't helping. that is a real diagnosis, you know?! all of you mommas know what i'm talking about.
when i started my career in the late 90's, i never thought that my focus of study, later my primary job focus, would one day become my everyday life. you see, i studied about these respiratory diseases, specifically in kids, and took care of children with multiple special needs, and then God gave me my very own child with all of these things. a little (less than 4 lbs) blessing on loan straight from Him. isn't it cool how He does that? He showed me how little control i really had over things. He showed me that our children are truly only "ours" for a short while, and they really belong to Him; that He could give & take away, and still blessed would be His name. it really is for His glory.
after many difficult pregnancy days: lots of sickness (throwing up almost every.single. time i would brush my teeth--sorry if tmi), no heartbeat at about 12 wks, followed by an ultrasound (the day after. yes, a long 24 hrs), finding a cystic hygroma (sorry don't how to link that yet), followed by asking if we wanted to terminate and do genetic testing, bleeding at 16 weeks, bedrest at 21 weeks , being told i would deliver within a week and he wouldn't live, then 4 weeks of home bedrest and 5 weeks of hospital bedrest (coupled with gestational diabetes). whew! that's exhausting to think about. he arrived last year on may 3, 2010 at 2:36 p.m. he was a breech delivery. that's right, feet first. so glad we were at a hospital that was willing to do this. i tell you all of this to bring you to today and where we are now.
he spent 8 weeks in the hospital. came home on oxygen and a feeding tube. no more oxygen or feeding tube! (insert excited voice) many, many doctor appointments. but now less appointments. many nights of reflux and meds to accompany. no longer active reflux or meds. many episodes of gagging, puking & blue spells to go along w/ feedings. now eating some table food without gagging or turning blue. both kidneys with issues. now only one w/ issues. came out floppy and not breathing. (i know this is out of sequence) now progressing w/ physical therapy and even pulling up to stand.
i could go on & on. we have all grown in so many ways. our marriage has grown. we haven't gotten it perfected. but God has given us grace in more ways than imaginable. i really don't know where we would be without Him. do you? maya has been homeschooling and has grown in character in more ways than imaginable. she is learning so much, not just academically, but about life & Christ. isn't that what really matters anyway? it's not backpacks, and school bus rides, etc that will make a difference. it really is about how she grows in Him. and a little plug for grace fellowship church....if you are a parent, now would be a good time to visit. so thankful to be part of church that has this teaching. and hoping to grow even more in "parenting with joy." "joy" being the key word. after all, our joy can only be found in Him. i still feel like a novice.
and i will leave you with this, i would covet your prayers for this new little one growing inside of me. i know our Father is in control. scared? sometimes! when asked if there's a chance of this little one being "like myles," my response is that the doctors have said, "no." however, i'm holding loosely to this. after all they're human, earthly doctors. only our Great Physician really knows. and if he/she is "like myles," this is God's perfect plan. His plan is perfect all.the.time. our plan? no. but i am so thankful that i can rest in the fact that He knows what He's doing. it may not feel good at the time, but it is ultimately for our good. so, my prayer is for His will to be done.
